Managing Big Emotions

Tips from a Highly Sensitive Person

Chances are you clicked on this article because you find yourself faced with a barrage of big emotions (or, ‘motions’ as I like to call them).
These motions seem to consume you as they mimic that of a tidal wave - often out of nowhere.

Naturally, these big feelings affect not only you, but those around you - partner’s; kids; friends; family; co-workers; and sometimes even innocent bystanders.

And so, whether of your own volition, or a compassionate suggestion, you find yourself wanting to figure out exactly how to manage it all.
Well, you’ve come to the right place, as this article plans to do exactly that.

Let me begin by sharing that I am a Highly Sensitive Person, which means that I am easily overwhelmed and overstimulated by smells, sounds, lights, information and feelings too. I have always been this way, and I still am today, although now I have tools to help me.

Important to note is that learning to manage your big emotions does not mean that you will not feel your big emotions, it simply means that you will learn to hold space for them so that they do not consume you (remember that tidal wave I mentioned earlier?).

What to do when you feel the tidal wave building:

  1. Pause whatever you are doing or saying, and get back into your body.
    Close your eyes and place your hand on your heart, or if that is uncomfortable for you at this point in time, connect your fingertips.
    Take three deep breaths (inhaling for five counts, and exhaling for five counts)

  2. Name your feelings.
    “I feel…”
    (Vitally important is that you take ownership)

  3. Ask yourself; “What do I need right now?”

  4. If possible, share your feelings and needs with whomever you are with.
    Eg: “I feel very angry/hurt/sad right now and I need five minutes alone, please.”

Learning to manage one’s big emotions takes time, energy and practice, so please do be patient with yourself. Remember that your capacity to feel, and to feel deeply, is an incredible gift - it’s just about learning how to surf the big waves.
Also, if you’d like to learn more about Self-Soothing, click here